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These things are still here.. [04 Nov 2013|07:19pm]
[ mood | determined ]

We will be the first generation to see our lives played out over the internet. That's cool with me though. Wow where to begin. Life has changed so much and am in a low point but things are looking good for the future. Sometimes I spend too much time worrying about what others think not realizing it doesn't matter! Had to cut a lot of people out of my life, some who I thought were friends who stabbed me in the back ( I don't even know what the reason was, to hear it from them they thought it was natural for them to do.. something happened to this world while I was gone and it makes me really sad. bah why am I such an emotional QQ sometimes lol will never see me cry but I feel the rain) everyone seems to not care or have any values anymore. I can not bring myself to do or act in the way they do.. keep me strong. Something isn't right...

2 people| screamed

Some times you just have to roll with the punches [27 Feb 2009|10:43pm]
[ mood | restless ]

So showing up to work too many times in the military is REALLY bad I guess. It doesn't help i've got this sgt. in my squad it just hates my guts for some reason but whatever ya know he's getting out of the army soon anyways. So i've got to go to this 6 week rehab like class thing in march til april. guess that means i'm gunna be non deploy-able for this march thing going on. I really hate that though I would love to go an do it. What ever when I get back from this stupidness going to change a bit of the way I do things. Maybe this is what I needed to collect myself together anyways. Things have been sort of spiraling real quick downward out of control. Have an awesome squad leader though and the rest of my chain of command is really making it pretty easy for me to get back into the action so when I come back from this I can train up an get my shiza straight.
Met this pretty german rocker girl at the class 6 earlier (it's a gas station/liquor store noooo I just got some groceries =d) pretty coolness she's smart too not like all these dramatized club going german girl we meet at the club. Got the # so maybe something cool will come out of it.

Everyone else already left for the last train to go out tonight. Woke up too late to go with, couple msgs on my phone saying they stopped by my room an knocked but guess I was just outttt. What a day had Class A inspection an room inspection.

Well shall update more later.

1 people| screamed

raar [06 Jan 2009|06:24pm]
i really wish casey hadn't left blah but ya know i hope i was able to take something from the way he lived life. i think if he was still here he wouldn't hold back on the oppurtunity i've been given im in europe im rich an im young. lets have a balla time thank you casey

[05 Jan 2009|07:28am]
So it's the new year yay. Just came back off of leave an realizing that i have so much back home that really should be taken care of lots an lots of loose ends but it was nice. Just wen by really really way to fast. Alot of that is my fault though I let drinking get the best of me once again. We've decided to stop drinking so much an start going out on trips to like italy frace spain etc. i mean i'm in europe might as well right? go see something

A work in progress [11 Nov 2008|09:48pm]
Let's discuss Alpha,Beta and the Omega....

Drink Drank or Drunk? [27 Mar 2008|05:57pm]
Bleh i miss good times things are so different, getting drunk in a bar is really different def not used to that. So i've ended up in the hospital with a .35 last week been showing up drunk for formation a bunch altogether pretty much just turned into a drunk lol. Not much of a suprise I guess but it's pissing me off cuz it's fucking shyt up. I mean yea it's alot of fun but man it's ridiculous! I've been pale lately from drinking so much hell I even go raped by this married girl the other night wtf is up with that?!?! She was married so I kept telling her no but got way to trashed an ya... Fuck oh well either way I just need to slow down on my drinking or something maybe find a hobby. Not that it's going to happen this weekend....since ya know bikini contest tomorrow night atcheers an partying with everyone at check point on saturday. I've been having to have money shipped to me since thought I lost my card for my bank but I just gave it to my friend so I didn't spend anything but forgt it the next morning soooooo I decide to freeze my account now it's this big deal. Yay. Leaving for the box mid april fun stuff....not. Oh well it's only a 7 month tour any ways so won't be there to long. Get to kick in some doors shoot some fucks an blow shyt up atleast. Ahh i'd really like a blunt right now well i'm out so peace
1 people| screamed

It's been forever [19 Feb 2008|07:06pm]
since i've put an entry in this thing but i think i'm going to more often now. i'm off for germany! just waiting on my flight trying not to pass out in the food court so all my stuff doesn't get jacked lol. so i went to this place like chipoltes it's alright....it's just like chipolte's just called something else. haven't gone to sleep since yesterday last night was kinda strange but kewl at the same tyme everyone was acting strange for some reason an everyone kept saying they were tired.....everyone was prob really tired. Hahaha they have piano music in the airport food court tell me that's not friggin ridiculous. still need to go pick up some headphones for my laptop...for some reason it won't let me sign in to aim express. these two nubs justsat in front of me so now i can't scope out the food court for hotties blah .... oh well germany woot! so i need to send tj a bottle of absinthe casey some cola flavored beer....i don't know if i ever have heard of that one but whatever if they have it i'll send it. can't wait to have my first beer in germany that'd be pretty fucking sweet i'm just waaaaaaay to tired an need to sleep on my flight. an damn it i'm stll sick as hell feeling like shyt bleh i can't wait for my flight so i can go to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
4 people| screamed

OOO WEE [03 Jan 2008|10:46am]
Ah this fucking sux ass lol I leave back to Ft.Benning today yay...not. Heh, oh well two weeks of hard ass getting stomped on training an then I get my blue cord an lock down is over with!!!!! Ah I just hate BULLSHYT though that's why this fucking sux so much grrr. Oh well anyways back in a month to do "hometown recruiting" I go to high skewls an say hey! you should join the army cuz it fucking kicks ass! Which ya alot of it does but god damn basic was gay as hell an Infantry training is the exact same as basic so even more lame! Just two weeks just two weeks gotta keep reminding myself it'll all be done in the blink of an eye. Bah 10 mile battle march an shoot 5 mile run apft 5 FTX that is gunna suck some ass it's freezing an we're sleeping outside for a week in the woods yay!!!not. Oh well when I come back i'm getting my truck's bed door fixed lil dent from a drunk accident an putting some SoOoOound into that shyt give it some bounce =D. Kinda feel like I wasted this vacation bullshytting around alot not getting anything done but eh it was damn sure nice to not do jack shyt for 3 weeks! Hmm alrighty i've gotta leave but where should I have my Last Supper ??!!.............


Til I get on back home [18 Dec 2007|10:56am]
An now i'm home!!! Yay! ahh it's nice that was some annoying ass 2 months but whatever only have to go back do 2 weeks and i'm done! done i tell u! it's great =D. Well been pretty busy here tyme is flying by so fast I don't want to believe but it is. ahhh so instead of wasting tyme on here i'm out!
3 people| screamed

Alright so [23 Sep 2007|11:47pm]
We already had a night of ridiculous alcohol 350$ in liqour an beer kinda sick lol buuuuuut we decided to go ahead an do the kegger too. tomorrow is gunna be pimp! leaving thursday for basic ahhh it's so fucking close. gave me 29,000 for a sign up it's ok i guess i max was 40...wish that could've happend. poor zack didn't get anything guess grading high school does me something cuz u can't get shyt with just a ged. oh well tyme to get shyt done!!! hell yea!

Wishing [25 Aug 2007|03:34am]
I had a blunt right now =( eh oh well haha i've learned coffe an me an lots of candy do not mix that was just as bad a yay an i hate that shyt half a pot of coffe an lots of candy in an hour means darek tweaks the fuck out haha well i'm sure the not sleeping for a couple days didn't help with that...
hmm so going in to the recruiter tomorrow to learn some nav shyt an doing running an all then monday going to a parents friends to shot an get used to it haha who knew my parents knew someone who had automatic rifles??? only a few more weeks. also getting ready to have the multi kegger!!! oh man that's gunna be a blast! heh casey said we should charge people but it wouldn't matter anyways not like he's buying it. haha we've been beating the shyt outta FF 12!!! not really much else to do unless i wanna be around a bunch of drugs which the ones i can do i don't like doing so no point really.
I really have a problem with answering my phone haha or checking my voicemails for that matter.
Filled up my truck tonite so i think i'm gunna go somewhere tomorrow after I leave the recruiters not to sure of where though eh i'll figure it out tomorrow. maybe the beach or something I REALLY REALLY need some sun
well early day tomorrow so i'm out
going to be so glad to leave this place
3 people| screamed

hoo rah! [15 Aug 2007|10:45pm]
well heres to sleeping in fox holes an standing in 130 degree weather! not really worried or scared mainly excited to get the hell outta this shyt hole an do something with my life. got a feeling basic is going to be the biggest bitch outta everything though, fuck being shot at fuck the weather fuck the scorpions an spiders some motherfucker yelling at me day an night telling me to do pushups an shyt like that is going to annoy the shyt out of me but hell going in as an e-3 cuz of my asvab score a 72 mofo's! how does the pothead score well an everyone else almost fails? lol an some kinda training my recruiter is doing with me learning how to read military maps an shyt like that. 1500 a month and a 40k sign up bonus cuz i got it maxed out yeeeaaaa lmao just heard the funniest thing ever "it smells like a lawyer, cowboy" oh fuck yes tim allen is drinking an amber bock lo0o0o0o0o0o0ove it love it best beer EVER. eh well rant over ciao
2 people| screamed

i found comfort in this bottle [10 Jul 2007|12:34am]
Wow, so here it goes....ok life changing in 10,9,8,7,6,5.....1 i hope this goes well, i don't know i'm so scared i just don't know what to think i'm done with this life i know that but i just don't know whats after that. i just don't know why don't i know why does it feel like there's something beneath the surface clawing an scratching to get out of me. it leaves me weak an delirious an so confused it's kinda odd like for a while i'm not me an it just throws everyone i know off i'll be like that for an entire day an they just think i'm acting weird but it's just like someone else has control ah why am i going off on this rant this s what everyone else uses these for but i mean fuck if u can write in livejournal your life ain't that bad. eh i don't know i dont fuckingknow wtf

this evening [23 Jun 2007|02:47am]
we should just take some time out an get away from everything

my truck is still in the bloody shop...I was supposed to get it back today so i don't know what going on... =(
hmm i really need to start getting my life on track though. not really doing to much nothing seems to interesting the highlight of the day is the parts i can't remember cuz i'm blacked the fuck out.
an is it soooooo bad I don't want a relationship til I figure this shyt out??!?!
of course she says she doesn't care but i mean everything is just waaaay to chaotic to have anything more to deal with then just sex. eh i don't know what to do anymore. wait yea i do....i'm gunna go smoke a joint peace nukkas

how about we just take the night off?
lets go...
2 people| screamed

so look into my eyes what will you leave behind? [28 May 2007|08:50pm]
So super score! La I got my wheels =D =D =D =D =D ford explorer sports trac 04 tis soooo sxy an leather =D. sucks though the first night i got it i got it stuck bottoming out going up hill in sugar sand lol oh well we got it out glad to have friends with gangsta ass off road vehicles. what would've really sucked was since it was the first night i had no insurance so that bitch would've been stuck lol. well either way woke up the next morning drove to a car wash dropped off casey paseed out then the workz. an last night joe came over! we got some goodies =D stayed up til about 9 or 10 am joe went home kinda early though cuz of something or the other not to sure why. fucking casey had a seizure at my job while i was the mod an i'm so glad he's alight we thought he was bleeding from the mouth but it was just a cut on his lip. haha we thought he might've hit his head a bit hard by the gurl he picked up last night. well came home an crashed today now just waiting for people to hit me up. anyone wanna chill?? =D
1 people| screamed

Uh [03 Apr 2007|11:57pm]
I really don't know what to say. just need to get a few things out of my head I guess. i've spent the past weekend in hell, i don't even remember what it was like but the burns that were left on me from it still hurt. everyone is against me now because of it, though it was just a stupid mistake that i never meant to even do. blah i need to change i mean almost dying once is bad enough right...
so where will fate take me now?
oh! greeeeat news though haha since they did blood work on me i found out that i'm going to give this gurl i met from tampa the biggest hug ever cuz she didn't have anything lol
I just wish I knew what to do now...
4 people| screamed

The boomerang theory [07 Feb 2007|10:07pm]
Next week bahamas. laid back yall =d
1 people| screamed

anywhere with anyone making out [16 Jan 2007|09:33pm]
ugh so pierced my ears....again...for like the 412341234 tyme.
1 people| screamed

and then [08 Dec 2006|10:33pm]
you have to just do what you gotta do

much peace & love to all
have an amazing holiday!

It feels so good to know
Its so good to feel

Everything has turned upward an rocketed off lately. I don't know what's up but whatever shall just enjoy the moment an not regret it.
Almost every single tyme I open this thing I don't know what to put in here. but this is atleast a very happy short note so yay!!!!!!!!!
4 people| screamed

:( [23 Sep 2006|12:42am]
Fuck...fuck...fuck...fuck...fuck...what am I gunna do....it's not like I can or am I just taking the easy way an saying it's not possible...
4 people| screamed

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